So if you know me personally, you know that this summer has not been the easiest or the best. There’s just been a lot of things floating around and making me a bit crazy and, well, I’m glad the summer has now passed. One side effect of all this is that I’ve had a serious uptick in my levels of personal anxiety – moreso than I’ve really had in years – and while I wouldn’t advice crying a river for me, it hasn’t been a walk in the park either.
Ah, whatever. Point is, I found myself a few weeks ago holed up in a Days Inn in CT, doing my little residency at the Aldrich and slowly but steadily freaking out. Not really fun, but I got through it. One of the things that got me through it was making these obsessive little drawings. I’d come “home” from the museum, quickly drink a bunch of wine, turn on the cable TV, and sit and draw. I’d finish each drawing by writing lightly over the pattern I’d made the name of something I love – I did this to make the drawing more of a hopeful act and less about my drunkenness and paranoid desperation. I was thinking of them as drawings to protect me from nightmares (I have a lot of nightmares) and they definitely did go the distance in terms of comforting me and keeping me together.